CEO Bros and Office Hoes
The Weekly Recap.
While I am perfectly content to discuss at ease the people and the projects that come out of Hollywood, I had to buckle down this week and get into the behind-the-scenes drama and dynamics of the machines that keep the industry moving.
One of Hollywood’s major players, WarnerMedia, recently merged with Discovery, Inc. to become “Warner Bros. Discovery”, and the company announced this week that its streaming services of HBO Max and Discovery+ will join to become one single platform, starting next summer.
Under the corporate hand of the media conglomerate’s new president, David Zaslav, HBO Max is now expected to layoff more than half of its development team as a result. And, in a domino effect, much of the original content created exclusively for the platform is at risk of being cut. Says one company insider, “Sounds like they’re not doing HBO Max scripted shows anymore with HBO taking over, so less scripted shows overall.”
In a quarterly earnings call with executives this week, the president of Warner Bros. Discovery’s global streaming division announced its strategy for putting content together in a way so “there’s something for everyone in the household.” Unfortunately, upon seeing this so-called win-win situation, I couldn’t help but laugh:
Like, I’m sorry… is HBO Max “for the boys” now?? Was the thought process here to let the men have their serious drama series while the women play around with their silly little home renovations? Ah yes, let me “lean back” and watch my unscripted shows that require no mental fortitude or critical thinking… wouldn’t want myself to pull a muscle! Also, what in the hell is a “genredom”… you just told me I was too stupid to “lean in” and watch HBO Max, don’t be throwing out new words to confuse me! I’m just a little Southern belle, deary me! I don’t even know how a TV remote works, there’s too many buttons! Thank god I have my “female-skewed” programming to comfort me!
In addition to that, original Warner Bros. films made exclusively for HBO Max have already begun to be erased from the platform, and considering it has become routine for streaming services to provide monthly updates about available titles, it was shady that those removed this week were done without any prior notice. According to another insider, “The content being targeted for removal tends to be shows and movies that are not performing on the service but have an opportunity for a partial [tax] write-off.”
While I understand making movies is a business, this reasoning is simply so boring to me. It’s giving me nothing. Whatever happened to studio executives who actually loved movies and dedicated themselves to making them?? I want my Hollywood executives to be throwing back glasses of whiskey, throwing down contracts on their desk, and yelling into a landline rotary phone that they don’t care how much it costs or how long it takes - they are making this picture!!
All of this overhaul news comes on the tail of the company’s controversial decision earlier this week to outright cancel the release of its already completed and anticipated film, Batgirl. The project - an estimated $90 MILLION production, might I add - was slated to stream on HBO Max, but reportedly did not make the cut after the decision by Warner Bros. Discovery to prioritize efforts and costs on its theatrical releases - like its upcoming DC films, The Flash and Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom. It’s interesting to me that the one female-led film in that group was the one to be cut, but that’s none of my business*.
*It’s my business.
At the end of the day, I am not an expert in Hollywood politics, but I do know that it’s not a great look to start scrapping films and canceling shows (without a warning for the actors/writers/producers/directors/etc.) in an effort to re-work a company that seemed to be working fine as it was. I also happen to know good television when I see it, so if any of My Shows on HBO Max get canceled simply due to corporate greed, I will be writing a letter.
That is all I have to say on the matter for now, so I will leave you with this excerpt from an essay written by Martin Scorsese on the current state of the industry:
*Mean Girls Voice* I Don’t Think My Father, The Inventor Of Toaster Strudel, Would Be Too Pleased To Hear About This
In an interview with Hailey Bieber for her YouTube series, “Who’s in My Bathroom?” Gwyneth Paltrow shared her opinion on their shared platform of nepotism, saying, “I really do feel that once your foot is in the door, which you unfairly got in, then you have to work almost twice as hard and be twice as good.”
Now, before I get into what I’m about to say, I would just like to acknowledge that nepotism in Hollywood isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes, it actually benefits people who are genuinely talented and deserving of the work. It’s only when those who benefit from nepotism act like they don’t - and then use interviews (like this one) to try and give the illusion that having a backstage pass to the industry is actually a disadvantage - that it becomes annoying.
Like, are you really complaining about having to work and prove yourself? That’s what everyone does, you just got to skip the part where you have to ram through the barricaded door just to ask people how they like their coffee. Would you like the Oscar handed to you for just showing up on set? I mean, that’ll probably happen, but don’t ask for it right off the bat, girl! Ease into it! Play it cool!
Gwyneth, who had her feature film debut after being cast by her godfather Steven Spielberg, went on to share with Hailey of the famous Baldwin family: “People are ready to pull you down and say, ‘You don’t belong there’ or ‘You are only there because of your dad or your mom.’” But, in all fairness, that is part of why you’re there!
I’m not saying Gwyneth isn’t a talented actress or doesn’t deserve her accolades - I just think it’s a lack of self-awareness to believe that she, and those in Hollywood like her who say the same thing, would be in their exact standing had they been born to an average family in like Kentucky or something. Just say you’re grateful for the privilege, acknowledge the role that it plays, and go on with your day!
Anyway…
That’s The Sound Of The {Fashion} Police
Brad Pitt is currently on a press tour for his action-comedy film, Bullet Train, and he’s been using this time as an opportunity to promote not only the film but also his newfound attention to fashion.
And, as someone who tends to style themselves in accordance with their partners (re: Hollywood chic with Gwyneth Paltrow, beach casual with Jennifer Aniston, edgy bohemian with Angelina Jolie), it seems like solo Brad is ready to make a statement:
The first big look: Brad, hopping on board the current trend train, walks the carpet in a skirt. Styled with a disheveled linen shirt and combat boots, whilst showing off two calve tattoos that I was unaware existed, this moment sent shockwaves across the Internet. I still don’t really know how I feel about it, so, moving on!
The next big look: This teal suit that looks like its made of sweatshirt material. While that may sound like a diss, it’s the opposite; I actually think more clothing should be that comfortable. It looks like he watched the “Swuit” episode of New Girl (Nick and Schmidt create a suit made of sweatshirt material, for those of you in need of my TV knowledge) and immediately emailed his stylist like, “Ok, how do we make this work for real?”
The latest big look: In a bright green suit paired with a teal top and yellow sneakers, Brad is a walking example of summertime color-blocking. It’s giving lemon ice and a piña colada by the pool. It’s giving tanning under the sun and driving to the beach with the windows down. It’s giving live, laugh, love.
Bullet Train is in theaters now.
That’s Amore
The official line-up for this year’s Venice Film Festival was finally announced, and some of the big films set to premiere during the event (aka, the ones that I care about) include the ‘80s-set Timothée Chalamet vehicle, Bones and All; Olivia Wilde’s Don’t Worry Darling; and Netflix’s Marilyn Monroe biopic, Blonde.
From Aug. 31 to Sept. 10, the stars of these films will flock to The Floating City/City of Water/City of Canals (I don’t know, choose your favorite one; Google gave me too many options upon searching “Venice Italy nickname”) to promote their projects in competition for the event’s honorary “Golden Lion” award.
Therefore, if and/or when we get a photo of Harry Styles and Timothée Chalamet together in Italy (or even Florence and Timothée, aka Little Women’s top-tier couple, Amy and Laurie - I said what I said) I may have to put this newsletter on hiatus in order to recover from it all.
Celebrity News Briefs
Lady Gaga confirmed her role in the upcoming Joker sequel (reportedly a musical) with Joaquin Phoenix (Variety)… Ellen Pompeo is scaling back her role on the next season of Grey’s Anatomy (Entertainment Weekly)… Chrissy Teigen and John Legend are expecting their third child together (People)…
What I’m Watching
The Resort - in this original dramedy series, an anniversary trip puts a married couple to the test when they find themselves tangled up in an unsolved mystery that occurred on the island over a decade earlier. Now streaming on Peacock
Love Island UK - the iconic reality dating show that requires me to use subtitles because I can’t understand half of what the contestants are saying. I’ve already started incorporating their British lingo into my daily vocabulary, and I’m also in the market for a recyclable water bottle with my name on it and a fanny pack to wear around my waist like it’s a microphone pack. If you need me, I’ll be sitting by the pool, wearing sunglasses much too big for my face, announcing to no one in particular every time I’ve got a text. Now streaming on Hulu
Special Screening…
This week marked the 15th anniversary of one of my favorite films, Hot Rod. It’s my belief that it should be added to the Criterion Collection, and it’s my disbelief that I have been in love with Andy Samberg for 15 years.
What I’m Listening To
“Happiness” by The 1975 - the latest single from the band’s upcoming album, Funny in a Foreign Language.
In an interview with Apple Music’s Zane Lowe, frontman Matty Healy shared about the record: “It came through like jamming, and we haven’t done that in years.” The band’s sweet spot is synth bops like this one, and I will be adding it to my summer playlist immediately.
He also discussed fan-favorite producer Jack Antonoff and how their collaboration on the new album came about, saying, “I love Jack’s work… We became friends talking about production and what I was doing and what he was wanting to do and what I was wanting to do… And then I kind of just thought, ‘Well, this is like a really nice energy. Why don’t you like come down to the studio and see what happens?’”
The band also announced a new tour in support of the album, so if anyone would like to buy me concert tickets, you can check out the scheduled dates here.
That’s all from me this week! Thank you for reading, and please remember to subscribe and share this newsletter with your friends!